Reflections on July 4th: Saved By The Bell Edition

On our Nation's birthday, let us reflect on what the 4th of July can mean to us by examining the differing viewpoints expressed by the contestants participating in the 1991 Malibu Sands Miss Liberty Pageant. I'm sure most everyone can get behind at least one of these four philosphies.

The Capitalist
Speaker: Lisa Turtle
Dressed as: Patriotic Background Dancer from a 90's rap video
Speech: The 4th of July means Freedom, Liberty and 50% off sales at all major department stores!
July 4th Philosophy: Show your love of country by buying our way out of a stalled economy.
Commentary: It's hard not to give in to those Holiday sales. And stimulating the economy really is your patriotic duty, so it's best not to feel bad about all the clothes you bought yourself this on Friday that you maybe didn't need. ...right? Sure it is!

The Proud Historian
Speaker: Jessie Spano
Dressed as: The Statue of Liberty
Speech: The 4th of July means America. Our Country... Well, actually it's not our country it belonged to the Indians who inhabited -
July 4th Philosophy: We cannot truly embrace the good in ourselves without acknowledging the bad.
Commentary: It's a bit of a buzzkill. And she says "Indians" instead of "Native Americans," so the usually politically correct Jessie, makes a stumble here. It probably costs her precious points.

The Uniter, Not the Divider
Speaker: Stacey Carosi
Dressed as: Independence Day Barbie
Speech: To me the 4th of July means a time of togetherness A time of family, friends, fun and fireworks that's The Fourth.
July 4th Philosophy: Come on people now, smile on your brother.
Commentary: Alliteration is cool, but this speech is a little nervous. I don't quite believe it in her eyes or in her tone of voice. Disappointing, Stacey!

The True Patriot
Speaker: Kelly Kapowski
Dressed as: Betsy Ross meets Minnie Mouse
Speech: To me the 4th celebrates something that our ancestors gave their lives for. Something that makes our country stand apart from so many others Today, on our nation's birthday, let us remember that one gift that makes America so special: Freedom.
July 4th Philosophy: Support the troops! Let freedom ring!
Commentary This one wins hands down, reminding us that we celebrate joy that came at the sacrifice of others.

No matter which philosophy you adhere to, I hope everyone out there had a wonderful Indepence Day Weekend. Happy Fourth of July to all, and to all a good night!