Sunday, February 26, 2012

Oscars 2012: Live Blog!

(I'd like to thank the Academy for this five hour telecast...)

Here we go, the Mac Daddy of Awards Shows! The OSCARS! I will be updating this with my thoughts on the evening and let you know how my predictions stacked up against the results. In case you're like me and didn't see a lot of the best picture hopefuls here are some brief reenactments to get you up to speed on the nine films competing for the night's top prize..

Here's Part 1:

And here's Part 2:

Inspired, no? It's been quite a year for movies. While we're waiting for the show to start, you can watch this to learn exactly what you need to do to have your movie get a chance at one of those golden statues...

There's still about 30 minutes before 90 minutes of red carpet and then 3 or so hours of show. We'll see how it goes!

We're going with ABC's red carpet coverage. Robyn Roberts who I don't know but I'm sure I've seen her somewhere. TIM GUNN AND NINA GARCIA are doing style commentary together! I can only hope she tells someone they look safe and boring, or that she questions their taste level. The only thing that could top that would be if Tim told someone their dress looked like student work. It will never happen, but I can dream!

Octavia Spencer, Maya Rudolph, ann Rooney Mara all look lovely. Jonah Hill is in total black. I forget that dude's nominated this year! Mila Jovovich looks lovely too. This is her first Oscars! So far no one looks horrible.

Bob Iger and the Prince of Monaco are talking to Robyn Roberts. This has to be the most random interview of the night.

Emma Stone is wearing fuschia and a giant bow, which she acknowledges. She is awesome. She is presenting! So we'll see her again later on.

Nina Garcia likes Jessica Chastain's look, and I have to agree she looks hot. They have to show us a fashion"don't" eventually to balance out all this good taste.

Viola Davis! Love her! Michelle Williams! Love her! And Christopher Plummer in a velvet tux? This show can end right now.

A montage of moms talking about the nominees. Aww. And now here comes Melissa McCarthy and her mom and they are crying and hugging. She's so sweet. I'd love to see her win if it didn't mean that super sweet Octavia then had to lose. Let's score it a tie, folks!

Kristen Wiig! Tina Fey! And then there's Colin Firth. I love him so. He's taking it easy this having taken home the Oscar last year. I really an liking the Brit lady who's doing the interviews. Lousie Roe. I need to look up who she is at the next commercial.

Jean Dujardin! He's a sweetheart. I hope he beats Clooney for best actor. Clooney's already got an Oscar. The Artist for the WIN!

Nina is being very nice to everyone. Show me someone who's NOT dressed well!

Wikipedia tells me Lousie Roe is known for hosting BBC's The Clothes Show, E!’s Fashion Police, E!'s Perfect Catch, and the CW TV show Plain Jane. That's why I don't know who she is.

J. Lo is there. Just so you know.

Lousie gets to try to banter with Nick Nolte. He has pet crows and a pinball machine. God bless her.
Zack Galifinakis is there. Just so you know.

Penelope Cruz looks amazing. "There is no critical analysis!" to her style process she assures Tim Gunn. lol.

I've just learned that over on E! Sacha Baron Cohen — dressed in character from his upcoming comedy The Dictator — dumped an urn of ashes over Ryan Seacrest on air, saying it was the remains of Kim Jong Il. Sigh. A little desperate, me thinks.

Bradley Cooper has a moustache and a decent Christopher Walken impression.

Gwyneth looks lovely in white. Glenn Close (but no cigar!) looks kinda awesome in a black Zac Posen dress with blazer.

My attention to dresses is fading... I need the actual awards show to start soon!

Brad Pitt... Sandy Bullock... I'm tired of interviews. It's sexy times for Sandra tonight, but I'm zoning out until Billy Crystal shows up.

The Oscars have started! Morgan Freeman is here! Where's Billy Crystal? The hyper orchestra is threatening to overpower him.

Billy Crystal is putting himself in lots of movies. Including an extended clip of Tintin which I'm pretty sure was nominated for nothing. Maybe special effects? I don't know. He's doing some jokes. His mike is all messed up. It has some kind of mechanical feedback to it.

The mike for his song montage isn't right either. Somehow his competence makes me yearn for the train wreck hosting of Franco and Hathaway from last year.

Oh no, it seems to be the main mic that is giving the digital sounding feedback. That means everyone is gonna sound that way??! All-night? I'm gonna switch to watching in non-HD and see if maybe the signal is different. I don't know why it would be, but I really don't want to listen to it all night.

Cinematography goes to HUGO! No, I'm 0-1! Art Direction also goes to HUGO. I'm 1-2! Let's keep it up.

After commercials, the audio problems have not been solved. Ugh. There's a montage of lines from movies that you've seen in at least a dozen other oscar montages. Seriously, this is filler of the lamest order.

Best Costume Design goes to THE ARTIST! I'm now 2-3. Cameron Diaz and J.Lo present Best Make Up and crack themselves up with silly posing before reading the name. This not taking themselves seriously moment is my favorite moment of the night so far. Best Make Up goes to IRON LADY! Ugh, I'm back 2 out of 4.

There's yet another montage of people talking about movies they've seen. God help me, just show twice as many commercials instead of this!

Sandra Bullock comes out to tell us that the Academy decided to simulcast the audio in Star Wars Android Speak which is why we're heaing the computerized sounding feedback. She doesn't actually say that she says something in German-Mandarin. Ugh I don't know. Best Foreign Film goes to A SEPARATION! 3-5 for the night.

It's Christian Bale! I thought he might beat the shit out of whatever's causing the audio problem, but he does not. He presents best supporting actress to OCTAVIA SPENCER! Yay! She's lovely. Everyone in that category is, but I'm very happy for her. She is crying. Aww, she tries to thank everyone. Christian Bale helps her off the stage and this hot violinist starts rocking out hard core as we go to commercial. I'm at 4-6.

Focus group montage from THE CHRISTOPHER GUEST CREW seeing Wizard of Oz! Not as funny in the execution as was the premise. Kinda the theme of the night.

Tina Fey and Bradley Cooper present Best Film Editing to... GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO! That's a shocker. 4-7. The winners are totally unprepared to say anything. They charmingly flee the stage.Tina and Bradley also present sound editing to HUGO! The winner for Hugo gets out the best line of the night so far by saying "if I've forgotten anybody, then you probably know who you are." They're also handing out sound mixing to HUGO. So now I'm at 6 out of  9.

The Muppets introduce Cirque de Soleil and they interpret what it's like to go the movies. I don't know what it has to do with going to the movies, but it's still pretty dope. Especially when these girls come diving out of the ceiling on trapeze swings.

Gwyneth and Robert Downey Jr. do an extended bit on documentary feature and then give the award to UNDEFEATED! The winners seem REALLY young AND one of them gets bleeped. I'm at 6 for 10.

Chris Rock comes out to tell us how easy voicing animation is. "What's the next line? It's getting dark outside. IT'S GETTING DARK OUTSIDE! And then they pay me million dollars!" I want that job. He presents Animated Feature to RANGO. I'm at 7 for 11.  Did I go into a boredom coma and miss the Live Action and Animated Short categories? When are those happening?

Emma Stone and Ben Stiller come out to persent Visual Effects. They do an extended bit beforehand where Emma is super enthusiastic and tries to make the most of her time on stage. This is why she's so good on SNL. I actually laughed! I don't think I'd laughed yet the rest of the night.  Visual Effects goes to HUGO! 8 for 12!

Melissa Leo is here wearing a slightly odd dress and presents best supporting actor to CHRISTOPHER PLUMMER! Yay Captain Von Trapp!  His speech is awesome. I love Christopher Plummer. I have always wanted to be him when I grow up. These fools with the stop watch no better then to try and play him off. He thanks his beautiful wife last and the camera gets to her just in time for us to watch her break into an Ugly Cry. I love every second.  9 for 13.

Oh, I wrote this thing about Billy's "What Everybody is thinking." but the blog erased it! I liked it though. It was old school fun.

Owen Wilson and the impossibly beautiful Penelope Cruz  present best score to THE ARTIST. Cool deal.10 for 14! And Will Ferrell and Zach Galifanakis or however the hell you spell it come out with cymbals and smash the hell out of them in front of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. I don't know why that's so funny but it is. They present Best Song to THE MUPPETS! YAY!!!!! So happy the Muppets got recognized. Bret McKenzie is a cool dude. There should've been more song nominees, but I'm glad the right dude took home the award! 11 for 15!

Angelina Jolie is showing A LOT of leg and she's loving it. She presents best adapted screenplay to THE DESCENDANTS! The Dean from Community has an Oscar!! Yay Jim Rash! Original Screenplay goes to MIDNIGHT IN PARIS! Woody Allen is not in the house. Angelina is taking the award on his behalf and you can try to pry it from her cold dead hands. 13 of 17.

The Bridesmaids are on hand to crank through the three remaining awards you don't know and which I've probably guessed wrong. Short live action goes to THE SHORE. Sorry, Time Freak. :( The winners are adorable though. Is there a Scorsese drinking game? Melissa McCarthy seems to think so. Documentary Short goes to SAVING FACE! I did pick that one! The winners give a lovely speech dedicated to the women of Pakistan. Animated Short goes to FANTASTIC FLYING BOOKS...! The winners are totally stoked. I get through the random pick categories 1 for 3. I'll take it. 14 for 20. Let's see if I can make it out of this thing 18 for 24!

Michael Douglass is on hand to present Best Director to MICHEL HAZANAVICIUS! He forgot his speech. But he'll ramble on. He thanks his cast including the dog. It looks pretty good for The Artist for Best Picture now. But we'll see if The Help doesn't pull off an 15 for 21.

It's 11pm and we still haven't had the In Memoriam. The show continues forward with no end in sight despite only 3 actual awards left to go.

Here we go with In Memoriam. They are going with live vocals which is always dangerous to me.There's nothing I hate more about these things than cut-aways to a live singer during a tribute to dead people. They handle this one well though. The visual stays focused on the tribute and it's a wide range of people who have worked in the film business in different capacities. Elizabeth Taylor gets the pimp spot at the end, as it should be. Well played. Oscars. That part went pretty well.

Natalie Portman is on hand to give out Best Actor and she has to read these long speeches about how awesome each actor is. LOL it goes on forever. But in the end she gives the best actor statue to JEAN DUJARDIN! YAY! He is delightful. I'm now at 16 for 22. Hey, are we about be treated to Colin Firth talking about the best actress nominees for 20 minutes? That's a show I can sit through!

Firthy is on stage looking wonderfuland talking it up to all the ladies. He gives a Mamma Mia shout out to Meryl which I enjoy. Never saw that movie though. Then he gives the award to MERYL STREEP! Oh no, I picked Viola! This isn't quite an upset, but I really thought it was Viola's year. Meryl's speech is very emotional and lovely.

A very subdued Tom Cruise is here to present best picture to THE ARTIST! Yay! It is oddly a small group of people on stage But the dog is there! These dudes rule. It was the only film of the bunch filmed entirely in LA! That's amusing. Billy barely gestures to them to move off stage before just announcing the show's over. So the show's over. I wound up at 17 for 24 on my predictions. Not too bad. I've done better, I've done worse. In terms of ceremony, I thought the show started VERY slow and picked up energy over time. Still the audio problems were annoying and took away from the enjoyment of the night. But we got through it! Thanks for reading! Until next time, go rent some movies!


King Jeremy

(At home, drawing pictures of mountain tops, with him on top, lemon yellow sun, arms raised in a V...)

It's always nice to have a new sports boyfriend. Don't get me wrong, Our Hero, Rafael Nadal is the true sports love of my life, but he plays but one sport and there are so many others to watch. There's Tommy, of course, with the Pats in football, but I've been without someone to love in basketball for awhile. The problem is that I'm a Knicks fan, and ever since Jeff Van Gundy left the head coach position in 2001, I haven't been able to properly emotionally connect to them. Yes, I realize that was over 10 years ago now, and the Knicks have spent the majority of that time without a real star or a chance as play-off contenders. It's been extremely painful and for the most part I haven't even been able to bring myself to watch the games. While there are other b-ball pros I've respected and enjoyed from other teams during that time, I've never been able to truly love them as a sports boyfriend should because they were not Knicks. I've always held out hope, however, that somehow the Knicks and I would find our way back to each other, and that path would be forged by a player as I was truly meant to fall for. 

Finally in comes Jeremy Lin. You don't need me to tell you his story. By now I'm sure you've heard it a million times and heard just as many puns on his name to describe the excitement surrounding his ascendance from unsigned bench player to sharpshooting phenomenon. Sure, he had a bad game against The Heat last week on the road, but that's bound to happen. Every night is not gonna be perfect, as he adjusts to the demands of the pro schedule and all the new teammates on the Knicks roster he has to get to know. What I like right now more than the results is the fact that the fight is there. It has called all the Knicks fans who'd been wandering alone out in the wilderness for the last decade like me back to The Garden. New York is a basketball town, and now we have someone to really cheer for.

Hopefully Lin and Stoudamire and Anthony will come together to be a real force in the Atlantic Division and the Eastern Conference overall. We're still a game under .500 on the season but I have hope that our fortunes will continue to change for the better. I'm glad to have a new sports boyfriend in my hometown. All hail, King Jeremy, the wicked awesome!

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Downton Abbey - Planning Ahead For 1920!

(they've got possibilities...)

With the finale of Downton Abbey's Season 2 airing only last week, and filming Season Three barely even underway in England, we have a long wait ahead of us before we get to watch new adventures of our beloved Downton crew on this side of the pond. In the meantime, we get to spend endless hours debating the possibilities of what's to come. I wasn't super thrilled with how much time got dedicated to Downton being a convalescent home in Season 2. It just didn't seem like Downton got to be Downton! But now that the war is behind us, it's time for Downton to roar into the 20's. It's a time ripe for opulence and eavesdropping and a time to refocus on the relationships and drama of the family and the household staff. Here's a character by character breakdown of what I hope is in store for next year. If you're not caught up through season 2, the rest of this post is a minefield of SPOILERS! Readers beware!

The Right Honourable Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham - I'd actually like to see Robert deal with a serious health scare. It would bring the question of inheritance back to the forefront and give Cora a chance to take care of him for a change. I'd like to see those two not so much at odds. Here's to marital bliss in '20 for the Earl and Countess.

The Right Honourable Cora Crawley, Countess of Grantham - I look forward to her having to deal with her mom on the scene at Downton. She should also scheme to get Sybil back at Downton for good! And take care of Robert when he falls ill as I mentioned above. Also maybe she intercepts a letter from Jane to Robert and has her killed. That harlot Jane must die! But Robert must never hear about this...

The Right Honourable Violet Crawley, Dowager Countess of Grantham - Sure, she'll face off with Cora's mom, but I'd like to see them bring in some love interests for Violet. Maybe a love triangle with special guests stars Michael Gambon and Ian McKellan!

Lady Mary Crawley & Mr Matthew Crawley - M&M need to get married. Now that they're truly engaged, there can be no more stalling, no more reasons why it can never be. I also just realized Mary doesn't even need to change her name! She can keep all her monogrammed towels! Aside from wedded bliss, Matthew should help try to free Mr. Bates from jail and Mary should torture Edith by flaunting her happiness.

Lady Edith Crawley - I wouldn't mind if Edith went insane from jealousy of her sisters and lost in a rage set fire to Downton (a fire at Downton would be AWESOME!), but barring that I'd like to see a love triangle (this show needs more love triangles!) with her two former suitors, Patrick Crawley/Gordon, aka Johnny Deformed and Sir Anthony Strallan, aka Old One Arm. If it turns out that Patrick Gordon really is Patrick Crawley, then Downton could go to Edith and Patrick instead of Mary and Matthew. DRAMA!

Lady Sybil Branson (née Crawley) - I want her back at Downton on a permanent basis. She needs to come back for the M&M wedding and to give birth. Maybe her newlywed driver husband Tom dies in an auto accident (oh, the irony!) and she has nowhere else to go. Whatever works. Bring back Sybil!

Tom Branson - I guess he dies. It's not really Downton if people aren't constantly dying. He seems the most likely to bite it in Season 3. It's sort of a shame though. He is very easy on the eyes...

Mrs Isobel Crawley - She has to stick around for the M&M wedding, but then she should go off on some zany off-screen adventures and come back with new ideas on how to improve Downton, then annoy the hell out of everybody as she tries to implement them. Much as she's done in the past. Hey, if it ain't broke...

Lady Rosamund Painswick - I hope Robert's sister becomes a falling-down-drunk alcoholic who wanders around Downton's many halls reminiscing about her youth and lost loves. She can also take an interest in making sure Edith doesn't turn into a miserable spinster and failing horribly in her attempts to marry her off to statues and potted plants around the estate.

Martha Levinson - Cora's mom! Shirley McClaine is on the scene! I'm sure her American sensibilities will scandalize everyone she meets. Hooray! I hope she throws her considerable wealth around in the most uncomfortable ways possible. Buy Downton right out from under the Crawleys! Open a banana stand right on the front lawn. YES!

Mr. Carson - Carson and Hughes, falling in love in 1920. He also becomes increasingly paranoid that Thomas is after his job by way of setting potentially fatal traps for him throughout Downton. Luckily for Carson, Thomas's schemes almost never work out according to plan. Although he did manage to off Pamuk...  Watch out, Carson!

Mrs. Hughes - Hughes and Caron, falling in love in 1920. Also she might realize that she can help Ethel the Whore by having Daisy give her War Widow pension to Ethel who needs funds to help raise her newborn child. Daisy doesn't want the pension anyway. I don't understand why this solution didn't dawn on her in Season 2. It seems so obvious.

O'Brien - I want to meet some of O'Brien's obviously evil relatives. They should come to Downton looking for work. Hopefully one will be named Miles and played by Colm Meaney!

Thomas Barrow - Thomas needs a boyfriend. With Thomas subbing as Valet for the incarcerated Bates, and William having died, it's time for some new footmen. Hopefully one of them can be Thomas's lover and either be his partner in crime or the force of good that keeps him honest in Downton. Either way, it's been a long time since Thomas got some action. He's overdue.

Mr. Bates - A storyline straight out of Prison Break? Shawshank Redemption? Green Mile? Arrested Development? Whichever way they go, I hope we see him dealing with his fellow inmates. It would be great if he told Anna during one of their visits that there was money in the banana stand...

Anna Bates (née Smith) - After inadvertently speaking to Lavinia's ghost on the Ouija board at Christmas, maybe she can return to the board to battle it out with the spirit of the First Mrs. Bates from across the astral plane to find out who, if anyone, really killed her. That information could help clear her husband's name and free him from prison.

Mrs. Patmore - hopefully she turns into Gordon Ramsay as she tries to turn Daisy into an actual cook. Also, she goes blind again. Sorry, Pats!

Daisy Mason (née Robinson) - I'd like to see Daisy steal all of Mrs. Patmore's recipes and publish them in a cookbook, which Mrs. Patmore can't even read to discover the betrayal because she goes blind again.

Gwen Dawson - I'd like to see Gwen show up again and let us know how she's doing as a secretary at the telephone company. If she's not a guest at M&M's wedding, she'd certainly come by to visit Sybil and her baby. Those two were besties. Gwen's a million times better than Ethel.

Ethel Parks - I want her to go away once it's resolved that she can have Daisy's war widow funds. Go away, Ethel and never return!

Isis The Dog - Isis needs a love interest and give birth to 101 amazingly cute little puppies, which the Dowager Countess wishes to turn into a lovely winter coat.

Julian Fellowes, you are welcome to all these amazing ideas. If you want to brainstorm with me on anything else you've got, you know where to find me.

Oscars 2012 - Predictions!

(Justice in Oscar Voting is Blind.)

It's almost Oscar Time! Billy Crystal is hosting and I've only seen about 2% or the nominees. Is this 2012 or 1992? I don't know why I missed so many of the nominated films this year. Perhaps it was just poor timing on my part. Also it didn't help that every video store around me has closed and Netflix split its steaming and DVD services and I chose only streaming as a result. Great for easy access to TV on DVD, less great for watching new releases. Anyway, here are my predictions. I'm rooting for The Artist to take home the top prizes since it's really the only major nominee I saw this year - at least I picked a good one! The "short" categories are all wild guesses. The other categories mostly adhere to conventional wisdom, but we'll see how well conventional wisdom serves come late tomorrow night or early Monday morning - whenever the telecast finally ends and all the winners are announced! Remember all you Hollywood soon-to-be-losers: it's an honor just to be nominated.

Best Picture The Artist
Best Director Michel Hazanavicius, The Artist
Best Actor Jean Dujardin, The Artist
Best Actress Viola Davis, The Help
Best Supporting Actor Christopher Plummer, Beginners
Best Supporting Actress Octavia Spencer, The Help
Best Original Screenplay Woody Allen, Midnight in Paris
Best Adapted Screenplay Alexander Payne, Jim Rash, and Nat Faxon, The Descendants
Best Editing The Artist
Best Cinematography The Tree of Life
Best Costume Design The Artist
Best Art Direction Hugo
Best Original Score The Artist
Best Original Song “Man or Muppet,” The Muppets
Best Makeup Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2
Best Sound Editing Hugo
Best Sound Mixing Hugo
Best Visual Effects Hugo
Best Foreign-Language Film A Separation
Best Documentary Feature Paradise Lost 3: Purgatory
Best Animated Feature Rango
Best Animated Short La Luna
Best Live-Action Short Time Freak
Best Documentary Short Saving Face

Friday, February 24, 2012

Delight of The Navigator!

I wanted to give a quick shout to a great show I saw last night at Workshop Theater. It's running for one more week and if you're in NYC you should check it out. It's the Navigator by Eddie Antar, Directed by Leslie Kincaid Burb. It's a fast-paced very engaging play that plays like a modern-day episode of The Twilight Zone, and I mean that as a compliment of the highest degree. The play explores what happens when a man who is not comfortable making life decisions suddenly starts getting expert guidance on any number of issues from his car's voice-response GPS system. The results are funny and touching and don't lead you where you think it might be heading, much like an actual GPS. :)

The writing is crisp and relatable and the performances are strong across the board - especially from my girl Kelly Anne Burns as the GPS system. Her physical and vocal precision are to be seen as to be believed as to be applauded. The runtime for the show is short and the tickets are cheap, which is always how I love my theater! The show runs through March 3rd so you still have 8 chances to see it. Don't miss out. This is one you'll really enjoy. Congrats to everyone at Workshop Theater Company. for their development of this piece. For more info on the show and how to purchase tickets go here.

Glee: Going Out On A "High" Note (Cuz The Writers Must Be Smoking Something)

(Diana gets a disturbing Google Alert that she may not be long for the Glee world after the shocking cliffhanger ending that's coming in 3...2...1...)

It's taken me a long time to break up with Glee. I figured I'd see the show through til the current crop of seniors graduated at the end of the current season, but this week I decided to cut my losses and say goodbye during the Winter Hiatus. Why do this, you might ask, when there's only a handful of episodes left to end the season? Well, following this week's shocking cliffhanger, I feel confident the show's not going to get better and that it could most definitely get worse. If you still enjoy the show, more power to you, but I'm done.

I've always admired Glee's dedication to exploring LGBT youth themes, but there's a big difference between concept and execution. When it comes to actually writing the scripts,  does the mantra in the writing room have to be, "Defy all logic and abandon common sense?" Glee has always been uneven in its storytelling, but initially that was part of its charm along with some very winning performances by young actors I liked. Now, despite the best efforts of that winning cast, the show is just infuriating. Let's look at the last episode as an example. They are able to shoot a rather chilling sequence where one-time bully Karofsky attempts suicide by hanging himself. That was a high point... but outside of that two minutes, the rest of the episode is a total mess! I can forgive almost all the unmotivated character development and plot contrivances as simply coming with the territory on this show, but the truly unforgivable offense for me is the episode is that the Glee Club performance at Regionals is BAD. The songs were blah, the choreo was uninspired and they simply shouldn't have won. It was there worst performance as a group to date, well below the standard of their Regional performance two years ago, and it was propped up by a bunch of back up dancers from the "Troubletones" group that haven't been seen since Sectionals. The group performs three songs and almost the whole core group sits out for one of them? LAME. And kinda lazy. And don't even get me started on the whole ridiculous Finn and Rachel getting married storyline. I'm sure it's something certain teenagers contemplate or do, but not these two. They have zero reason to get married and the fact that no adult on the show can talk them out of it is absurd. I'm so glad their Guidance Counselor somehow got "tenure" from the history department last week. She's doing an ace job there!

Ugh. So - SPOILER ALERT! -this episode ends with the shocking cliffhanger that Quinn is in a car crash because she's texting from behind the wheel. It's super sneaky on the show's part, because you think the whole episode is a big PSA about teen suicide when it actually turns out to be one about texting and driving. This show LOVES to abuse Quinn, or perhaps just her portrayer Diana Agron. After all the character assassination and rehabilitation they've done with Quinn, I'm happy to believe she got killed off in that final cut-to-blank, and I don't need the show to tell me otherwise when it comes back in April. She had made peace with her teen pregnancy, gotten into Yale, gotten back on the Cheerios squad, and wasn't trying to get with any of the boys to define her existence of her future. She went out on a high note. I doubt the show would actually follow through with killing her off, and they'd only mess things up for her moving forward. So I'm taking control of what I think the story should be in my own mind, and not worrying about how the writers are gonna cram a bunch of graduating seniors into an extra year at McKinley High. Here's a brief summary of the rest of what I'll just pretends happens on Glee from here on out.

"Quinn dies in the crash and everyone is sad and the wedding doesn't happen. Rachel regains her sanity and doesn't marry Finn. Blaine and Kurt break up and date their respective former abusers Sebastian and Karofsky like the show always wanted them to do. The New Directions Nationals performance is dedicated to Quinn and they win! After graduation, Rachel, Kurt and Santana go to NYC and become big stars and never return to Lima. Finn runs his dad's repair shop. Sam and Mercedes become the new power couple at school for the following year and they win Nationals again before graduating, but after Artie dies in a school fire in an episode depicting the necessity of checking your smoke detector batteries. Mike Chang goes on to win the 12th season of So You Think You Can Dance! Tina Cohen-Chang wins the fifth season The Voice and has a solo career! Sue gives birth to a girl named Quinn! Will and Emma have a boy named Quinn! Coach Bieste and Cooter have a boy named Artie! Finn marries Sugar and they have a girl named Artie! We flashforward 15 years where this next generation of kids all go to McKinley High where Brittany S. Pears is the Principal and they form a new Glee Club, despite singing having been outlawed by our new Alien Overlords. Everyone else I didn't mention died somehow in the preceding war with the Alien Overlords. The end."

See, Glee writing staff? It's not that hard. Feel free to take from any of what I've just offered here. I won't be watching, so I won't sue. And that will turn out to be what I've missed on Glee.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

The Amazingly LOUD Race! 20 Races To So Many Places

(Same old run around...) 

So The Amazing Race is now off and running..., for the twentieth time. I gotta say, despite how glorious in continues to look in HD - I especially liked the skydiving sequence - I can tell this season is not gonna be for me. So sad! You know I love my show of shows. There's just too many LOUD people in the cast this season. Everyone is gonna be yelling. I can see what's about to unfold. I'm going to have to watch on mute, or fast forward a lot when certain teams are on screen, so it's not worth the effort of recapping like I had been planning. See you in the blogosphere for Season 21, TAR!

I think I got spoiled with the abundance of milder-mannered teams they had picked the past couple races. I enjoyed all three winners of the race the past three seasons. You'd have to go back four seasons to TAR 16 with that team of Evil Lesbians where I was really kinda "whatever" about a cast. This group isn't overly inundated with "dating model" teams, but they all just seem to be cranked up to 11 volume-wise. So instead of a season of recaps I'll just name three teams that, at this early juncture in the race, I'd like to make it to the final leg and possibly win the big prize.

Option 1:

Names: Kerry and Stacy
Relationship: Cousins
My Team Name for Them: The Patty Dukes!
Here's Hoping: I would like them to succeed basically because I like to see non-sibling non-married relationships on the show. They seem like fun and capable women. I'd like to see them make a run of it. They're starting out at the back of the middle of the pack. We'll see if they can improve in the rankings.

Option 2:

Names: Nary and Jamie
Relationship: Federal Agents
My Team Name for Them: The Scullys
Here's Hoping: All-Woman teams have had a lot of success in recent years. 2 of the last three races had Lady Team wins. These two seem well-suited to keep cool in pressure situations. A 4th place first leg finish is respectable. I hope there is a firing range challenge where we can see these two kick some serious ass.

Option 3:
Names: Dave and Rachel
Relationship: Married, Fighter Pilot and Army Wife
My Team Name for Them: Army of Two
Here's Hoping: They won the first leg, so good for them! They got the Express Pass and hopefully they'll use it better than Team Bert & Ernie did last year. I'm concerned that there's a bit of a snag in their backstory about how they drifted apart in their relationship while he was at war... don't go on this Race to fix relationships! Killer Fatigue kills relationships, it doesn't make them stronger! But if they can keep it together they seem like very nice people and a strong team and could go the distance.

They have a lot of other very strong (and very loud) teams to compete against, so you never know what's going to happen. I'll have to check back in at the end and see if any of my teams were worth my early vote of confidence. As always, Onward Racers!

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Friends' Projects: Old Dogs & New Tricks!

I keep meaning to post this, and have been slow to do so only because life this month has been oddly very busy. As many of my friends have been working on some awesome stuff lately, I've wanted to showcase it and redirect to it more on the site, so I'm going to make a concerted effort for the rest of this month to rearrange the layout of the blog to do that.

First up, I wanted to post this fun web-series my buddy Ryland has been working on the past couple months. He has small cameos in the early episodes and then makes his true debut as a character in the season finale. And he'll be back as a series regular in Season 2!  "Old Dogs, New Tricks" is kind of like a "Sex & The City" meets "Men of A Certain Age" in that focuses on the life and love issues of middle-aged gay men in West Hollywood. I think it's sweet and fun and a well produced web series. You should check it out. Youtube eps are embedded below. They are technically deemed NSFW - for containing adult language and sexual subject matter which may be considered inappropriate for workplace viewing. Discretion advised!! But I'm sure you've watched more scandalous things on the internet at work. Yes, you have. You know it. Own it.

Anyway, here's the series. Congrats to Ry and to everyone else involved in the production. Best of luck with Season 2!

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

A Game of Hearts and Thrones

Happy V-Day, all. I saw this online and thought it was sweet. Having finished All The King's Men, Out of Oz and soon to be finished with New Frontier: Blind Man's Bluff, I believe I'm ready to return to Feast For Crows. A Song of Ice and Fire cannot be put off forever! Novelty V-Day cards always come in handy as a last minute gift today. Look through and choo-choo-choose your favorite one.

(click to embiggen!)

The artwork is by Chris Bishop and you can find more of his work for viewing and for purchase at 

My favorite here is probably Daenerys, with a special mention to Hodor as well. I'm slightly disappointed there is no card featuring Catelyn Stark. Perhaps one that said "It's a nice day for a RED WEDDING!" Maybe that's just my sick sense of humor.

xoxoxoxo, lovebirds!

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Grammys 2012 - Live Blog!

Ahh, Awards Season Continues. Tonight we get the Grammys. The awards show with a million categories and only about 10 awards presented on stage. The rest of the time it's performances by top nominated artists and lots of other celebrities acting the fool with their crazy ways as presenters. The Grammys knows what the audience wants!

Though I suspect this year's top honors will all belong to Adele, the ceremony itself should belong to Whitney. How could it not be? J.Hud is on hand to headline a last minute tribute. If there's a voice out there that can do justice to Whitney's songbook, it's her. Let's see who else does themselves justice with their live performances and who flops! Here we go!

BRUUUUUUCE! And E-Street. But no Clarence Clemmons. :( Already we are aware of artists we've lost. Wherever this flag's flown. We take care of our own. We could take better care of our own. They are rocking pretty hard. Well, played, Springsteen. Well played.

LL Cool J is on hand to host. He reads a nice prayer for Whitney. And we get a little clip of her singing I Will Always Love You. Awesome as always. LL keeps talking and talking. He's trying to rev everyone up. But everyone is revved up. Let's just get on with it.

Bruno Mars. He's hot-or-miss for me, but I think this is one of his better live performances I've seen. He also gives a shout out to Whitney. He's singing Runaway Baby. It's solid.

Alicia Keyes and Bonnie Raitt In the House! They also mention Whitney. But they are hear to sing for Etta James. OMG Bonnie Raitt is amazing. LOVE.

By the way, it's 25 minutes into the show and we are finally getting to the first award. Best Solo Pop Performance. ADELE WINS! She had some tough competition, but it looks like the Adele Landslide is already underway. She thanks her co-songwriter and her doctors and then it's offstage with her. She can thank other people when wins other awards later. She does not mention Whitney.

Chris Brown. Not a fan. His back up dancers are dressed like flying squirrels? He's dancing on what looks like the pyramid from Q-Bert. His singing is not up to the standard set by Bruno Mars. That's all I'm going to write about him.

OMG, I just checked the commentary for  EW's live blog and people there also thought it looked like Q-Bert! I am not alone!!!

Kelly Clarkson is coming up next! Will she also name check Whitney? We will find out after the second set of commercials. New season of Survivor is coming! Sigh. I'll be there, Probst. I wish I knew how to quit you. 

Fergie is looking mesed up and Marc Anthony looks like his normal self. Best Rap Performance goes to... Jay-Z and Kanye for Otis. Jay-Z and Kanye are not in the house for the Music's Biggest Night??? WEAK.

Kelly Clarkson and Jason Aldean! Kelly's album wasn't released early enough for Grammy consideration, otherwise Stronger would be all over this joint. They are performing on... the touring set of Wicked? I don't get it. Kelly sounds a little raspier than when I saw her on tour a couple weeks ago. All that belting on tour takes its toll! :) At the end they just seem to switch off Jason's mic even though he's still supposed to be singing. He seems confused. This wasn't a great live performance. It didn't really add anything to the recorded version. Still I hope she wins another Grammy tonight!

Have I mentioned how horrible I think that John Carter movie looks? I first saw the extended commercial at Disney World and thought it was for some cheap Direct to Disney Channel Movie, and couldn't believe it was actually the long in the works John Carter movie. I just think the CGI looks really unconvincing.

We're back to the show, and Jack Black is talking loudly outside the theater. I want him to stop. And then it's Foo Fighters! YES. These guys truly rock. Love Foo Fighters.

Here comes Rhianna and Coldplay. She found love in a hopeless place. She also found a whole squad of back up dancers in that hopeless place.  I'm scanning the dancers to see if I recognize any SYTYCD alums. I don't. They are probably there though. There's a lot of dancers out there on stage. Chris Martin is looking healthy. Sometimes he looks overly skinny. The momentum of this set has fallen off drastically. Let's move on to something else.

Downton Abbey has started taping! I can't wait to watch it once the Grammys are over! I have given up on The Walking Dead. I'll keep reading the comic, but I've gotten all I need out of the show itself.

Mario Manningham and Victor Cruz and that lady who usually wears the braids in her hair on NCIS. Cruz does his salsa. Best Rock Performance goes to...  Foo Fighters! Woohoo! They want you to be effing artists not some voice cycled through a computer. Word. And then our Computer Overlords shut off his mic.

Seacrest announces a Beach Boys reunion! And then introduces... Maroon 5? I think they sound terrible and slow and boring on Surfer Girl. Just my opinion.

Foster the People sound better on Wouldn't It Be Nice... initially. And then it sounds terrible. And they look PETRIFIED. And they change the lyric from sleep together to stay together? WTF? They are now murdering the song. How did this fall apart so fast?

Finally the Beach Boys are allowed to sing their own songs. They are OLD. Still they sound a million times better than the previous groups did. Foster and Adam join the Good Vibrations finale. No, send them away! They don't know the harmonies! And Adam looks mightily inconvenienced anyway. Well, the Beach Boys did a good job and deserve their moment on stage for lasting 50 effing years in the music industry.

Stevie Wonder is in the house. He is bringing it back to Whitney. It seems like he's going to sing Isn't She Lovely? He plays the harmonica and the audience starts clapping along, but he's just faking them out. Awkward. Then he introduces Paul McCartney! To sing the biggest bummer of a Valentine's song ever. Accompanied by a whoopie cushion? There's this weird noise that keeps popping up on the audio. This song is a total downer.

Chris Brown won a Grammy for best R&B Album. Not gonna deal with him.

The Civil Wars are the opening act for Taylor Swift. At first I think Taylor is on a set that looks a little but like she is in Dorothy's crashed house in Oz, but then I really it's just a Poor South version of the barricade set from Les Mis! She is singing Mean! Take that. Tom Hooper! She actually sounds a lot better tonight than usually does live. She seems totally stunned that people liked this performance. Was she attempting to phone it in and expecting a negative response?

NPH is here to announce Song of The Year... it's Rolling In the Deep! Adele and her producer run up on stage delighted, quickly say thanks and run away to hug and celebrate together. Love her brevity!

Katy Perry is on stage with a ton of dancers. Again I scan for SYTYCD alums. Still can't identify anyone. But I bet one of those boys was on my show of shows. She gave a very solid performance.

Best Country Album is going to.... Lady Antebellum! Swiftie denied! She looked really upset. There will be a song on her next album about this slight. Lady Antebellum dude should button his shirt. Actually a lot of these dudes should button their shirts. They don't have great chests.


Man she sounds so fantastic. And she looks amazing. I love the shorter hair on her. She REALLY starts to feel the awesomeness of the moment about a third into the song and then never looks back. Wow, she's the best. She gets several minutes to just stand there are take in the ravenous applause. Except for one skinny bitch in the balcony who is refusing to clap. Wow, that lady is heartless. What was she just listening to?

They are doing another tribute - this time to Glenn Campbell and I can't even concentrate, I'm still taking in Adele. This is really his Farewell Grammy Performance because of Alzheimer's. That's so sad! But it's nice that he gets this moment. Gaga is smiling! She hasn't smiled all night. She looked totally confused when the Beach Boys were on stage earlier. Like a rhinestone cowboy!! That was very nice! Plus he got a lifetime achievement award. So did Jobin! And Diana Ross! That's a solid group of artists.

Carrie Underwood is in the house. Here comes Tony Bennet too. They sing a straightforward duet of It Had To Be You. And then Best New Artist... is Bon Iver! Nicki Manaj looks WAY disappointed. Bon Iver would've been fine with her winning. But he'll accept the award anyway.

In Memoriam... Winehouse, Ashford, Jobs(??) Clemons, many many others. And then Whitney.

Jennifer Hudson does a great tribute to Whitney in her rendition of I Will Always Love You. It's a difficult position to be in, because it's such a signature vocal from Whitney, and J.Hud manages to sound a lot like her without sounding like she's trying to copy her. I thought it was really classy and sung very beautifully and it was a nice moment all around. Very very nice.

So now everyone on the planet is apparently doing a dance song. It starts with Chris Brown which is not a way to get me involved. When is this show ending? I need to watch Downton Abbey before bed.

Dead Mouse had a cylon face for a minute there! Now I like Dead Mouse.

Nicki Manaj. The level of crazy has gone up several notches in the Staples Center.

Lady Cerebellum returns! It's Record of the Year and as a surprise to no one Adele wins. She thanks radio DJs for playing the song and then again bounces off stage. One award to go. Almost there...

LL and Diana Ross announce Album of the Year and it's of course 21 for Adele. She is finally overwhelmed by the moment and cries and is lovely and thanks everyone and mentions she has a bit of snot and it's hilarious. Adele really ran away with the awards. How many did she win? Seven? She's amazing. Well-deserved.

McCartney is back. There is a guitar solo shredfest that I can barely describe but it was pretty hot and involved like a million awesome people including Springsteen who stayed around for the WHOLE SHOW to play again. That was nice of him. This year ADELE rules! We are all just subjects in her musical Kingdom. It's been fun y'all. Time for Downton!!

Greatest Love of All

And so passes Whitney Houston. It is a shame. Such an amazingly talented woman, with what should've been so much life still ahead of her. Whatever the cause of death is to be determined, 48 years seems hardly enough time. It was enough time for Whitney to make an impact on the world, no doubt, but it was not enough time for her to see her daughter grow up and be an adult and for Whitney to have grandchildren who would also grow up and for her to enjoy watching that happen. It was not enough time to completely tackle her addictions and enjoy what could've been decades of life lived without their terrible influence. As someone who brought so much joy to millions of people with her music, you'd wish for her that personal joy of love and peace in her life.

Growing up in the height of Whitney's musical power really left an impression on a generation of artists, myself included. What young child couldn't be impacted by The Greatest Love of All, or One Moment In  Time? They are such rousing anthems. I remember singing them in the car with my sister whenever my mom drove us anywhere. I feel like people my age know what I'm talking about. Didn't those songs make you want to be an artist? Didn't they make you want to be an Olympian? Yes on both counts for me. I truly believe she inspired kids to pursue those dreams. That her songs gave people a sense of confidence in themselves they might not have otherwise had starting out. Thank you for putting your incredibly voice behind those necessary words, Whitney.

Her voice was so soulful and it just blasted off into the heavens. There's a reason her Star-Spangled Banner performance is the best. Beyond the stellar vocals, it came from a place that meant something and it touches a place inside you that stirs that meaning as well. Watch any of her live performances back on youtube this week (and trust, there are many) and you'll still have the goosebumps you did the first time you heard.

Whitney could sing joyful dance songs, the saddest of love songs, Gospel music, inspirational anthems. It was all heartfelt. Everyone knows that the last 10 years or so were rough for her personally. The drugs and the crazy lifestyle and the "Being Bobby Brown" ridiculousness turned her into a public caricature of herself and left her with a vocal instrument that could not generate the same power she had in the 80's and 90's. Even the most powerful talents among us are still wrapped in a very human and fragile body. And now she's gone. I appreciate the musical impact she had on the world. I'm very sad for her family. During this difficult time of mourning, may they find their strength in love.

Here are some of my favorite Whitney songs and videos.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Super Bowl XLVI: Live Blog!

(We are ready for some football!)

Here we go with Super Bowl XLVI! Pats vs. Giants: The REMATCH! Faith Hill has dung her song. Kelly Clarkson has nailed the National Anthem. The teams are taking the field. The Pats win the coin toss (AFC has won the toss 15 years running!) Of course I am rooting for the Pats. If the game gets boring along the way, I'll explain how and why I became a Pats fan.  But for now here we go. I don't know if I've ever tried to live blog a sports event. We'll see how it goes. Refresh to see updates!

- Tom Brady always reminds me of Optimus Prime when he's in QB position on the field. Eli Manning always reminds me of The Great Gazoo from the Flintsonts. It's just something about the shape of their heads. They are not shaped the same.

- Giants get the ball first and Manning connects with Cruz for a first down. C'mon, Pats. Keep em to 3 and out!

- with 9:14 in the 1st Eli is sacked twice and the Giants are forced to punt. They pin NE to the 6 yard line.

- NE gets a safely called against them on their first possession. DAMN. score is 2-0 to the Giants. DAMN... that's really a shocker. Horrible start for the Pats. They look stunned. I am stunned. Also, it should be noted that the crowd is dominated by Giants supports. It's gonna be rough night for NE.

- 3:24 left in the 1st Qtr. Giants push the ball all the way down the field for a touchdown pass to Cruz. He does his little dance. Owen feels very very deflated. 9-0 Giants. Maybe the Pats will get the ball for more than one play on their next possession...?

- 1:30 left in the first Qrt. NE finally gets a first down. Pushing it to midfield. C'mon guys! Get it going!

- First quarter is over. 9-0 Giant lead but NE in good field position to get points on the board and get their offense going. They are gonna need some big offense since it looks like the defense is gonna be WEAK. This could be rough night for us Pats fans. I will keep the faith. Tommy can come back from a 9 point deficit. There is still a lot of game left to play.

- Commercial Update! I cannot believe they made a movie about the Battleship board game and that the movie has aliens invading Earth. Could they make this movie without someone screaming, "You sunk my battlehip!"? I mean, if they did, the whole thing would be a total waste.

- 13:48 left in the 2nd. NE has to settle for a field goal. 9-3. Let's see what the NE defense can come up with on this next Giants possession. We need a stop this time. Gotta keep cutting into that lead!

- Commercial Update: All the NBC comedies singing Brotherhood of Man aired earlier today. I wonder if they'll play it again during the game, but it made me slightly uncomfortable. Especially seeing the Community cast being forced to take part when NBC has pulled them from the current schedule in favor of Are You There Chelsea and Whitney. Sigh. See for yourself.

- NE again can't get the Giants to go 3 and out. Come on, guys!

- 10:00 minutes left in the half. Pats get the ball back at their 20. Let's see if they can make up some more of that deficit. Jason Pierre-Paul keeps knocking down passes for the Giants though! This is so frustrating! Welker comes up juuuust short of the first down and the Pats have to punt again. Sigh.

- 6:25 left in the half. Giants have had 13 first downs so far and the Pats only have 3! This is bad news for NE.

- 2:00 in the half. NE pinned again to the 4 yard line with an excellent punt from the Giants. Brady manages to get out trouble this time. He's got 2 minutes left and 3 time outs at his disposal to get some more points and get to halftime in a decent position. Will it happen??

- Commercial Update - Avengers. I will be there.

- :38 seconds in the half. NE continues to claw their way down the field for one more scoring opportunity before half-time. C'mon PATS!

- Commercial Update - GI JOE 2 makes me sad.

- :08 seconds. NE TOUCHDOWN!! Brady to Woodhead! NE takes the lead 10-9!

HALFTIME - I cannot believe the Patriots escaped that horrible beginning to finish at the half with a one point lead. Let's see if they can continue the better play in the 3rd and 4th quarters. It's almost time for Madonna. Let's see what she's got planned. i can't believe she's never done a Super Bowl. She can't be worse than the Black Eyed Peas. They were the worst.

Here comes Madonna - FOR SPARTA!!!!!

She looks a little nervous in that crown thingy... the crown is off and she looks relived... is she really singing... I guess she is with her own vocal tracks supporting her... LMFAO is in the house... I'd prefer they were not... Nick Minaj is on stage... the new song is not my fav but this is still one million times better than Black Eyed Peas... Cee-Lo comes on with a marching band... Like A Prayer is still killer after all these years... Madonna eventually escapes from the stage like she's Elphaba. Not soaring into the sky, but melting into the ground. Did you know that this whole performance was about world peace? No? Well, it was. And we're done. All in all I thought it was a good spectacle. Madge is kinda old for some of those costume though. Not that she isn't in amazing shape. She is, but the outfits still looked a little girl-ish instead of womanly, in my opinion.

Time for some more football! BRING IT ON!!!

My friend Vayu commented online that Madge actually went out Han Solo style, and that's a more apt description of what happened.

11:20 Left in the third. Pats go on a run for over 70 yards resulting in a TOUCHDOWN PASS TO HERNANDEZ! Pats take a 17-9 lead. Things seems to have settled down for Brady and the offense. Let's see how Eli and the Giants respond. Can NE come up with some defense?

6:43 left in the third. Giants push it down the field about 45 yards, but the NE defense denies them a trip to the red zone. The Giants make a field 38 yard FG so the Patriot lead is cut to 17-12. Let's see if Brady can get back those points and more on the next possession!

- Commercial Update - I thoroughly enjoyed the car commercial with Seinfeld and Soup Nazi and the NYC zipline and Jay Leno's rocket squirrel suit. But I can't remember what the car was so maybe it wasn't the most effective commercial.

5:36 left in the third. 3 and out for the Pats! BOOOO! Giants have good field position too, already on NE's side of the 50 yard line. We need another defensive stop!!

End of the third. 17-15 Pats. Giants scored another FG somewhere in there but I was distracted reading other people's comments about the Half-Time show. It seems like most people dug Like A Prayer but thought she seemed old for the first 3 songs. A fair assessment.

- Commercial Update -Is amused that NBC news is trying to make their "I-Team" seem like the X-Men. I want them to take it all the way though and give them FX super powers. Can the meterologist be Storm, or is that too obvious?

- UGH. Brady throws an interception intended for Gronkowski. At least it is all the way down at the Giants end of the field... Oy.

- Commercial Update - Bud Light - Here Wego. Ok, that one was cute.

Non-call goes in favor of the Pats. They get pinned in the back of their end of the field AGAIN. Woodhead is able to get an escape and up to the 31 yard line. Phew.

ANOTHER injury time out for the Giants?? They are dropping like flies out there!

UGH - the ball goes back to the Giants at the 11 yard line and here comes Eli! Launches it down the field for a completion! Now they're at the 50! Oh boy, Get a stop guys!!!!

TWO MINUTE WARNING. Oh, man. Eli's got one time out. A fresh set of downs. 20 yards to go. And only two points to make up. This is gonna be ROUGH...

The Giants score a TOUCHDOWN! But they don't mean to score!  They can't run out the clock now. Still they are ahead by 4 after missing the two point conversion. Brady's got a little under a minute to make some magic.

Oh MAN! Brady converts on 4th and 13! And they get out of bounds to stop the clock! There is hope! Still down 21-17.

Ay no. The Pats keep dropping the ball! WHY????? Only one play left. 5 seconds to go. Incomplete! Giants win. Didn't I see this movie before??

Well, Congrats to Eli and the Giants. I do like Eli. I favor the Patriots. But I like Eli just fine and I don't even dislike the Giants. It's not like they are the Steelers or The Eagles or The Cowboys or The Broncos. I actively dislike those teams. Giants played hard. They earned it. I won't cry for Pat Brady, as he goes home to his super-model wife and his beautiful children and his 8-car garage mansion in California. He's doing just fine for himself. I'm happy all my NYC friends will be in a good mood tomorrow. Trust me that it's easier for me to be gracious in defeat than it is to expect an entire city not to act like grumpy assholes. So we get a parade and another trophy... which I guess we can all visit if we drive out to New Jersey?

I do feel bad for Gronkowski though. He had such a great season and then got injured in the AFC Championship and just couldn't play up to his level this game. He's young and hopefully he can stay healthy in future seasons and give the Pats another run at the trophy.

Who's the MVP?? Bring him up already!! Eli Manning of course! Fitting. Gotta love Eli. His parents are the cutest. I'm happy for them that he gets another Championship. And he wins... a batmobile? It looks a batmobile to me. They should definitely give the MVP a batmobile.

Alright it's over. It's time for Downton Abbey on DVR!!! I will console myself in the loving embrace of the Dowager Countess!!