Tuesday, October 26, 2010
RIP, Paul The Octopus!
It is with a heavy heart that I bring to you news of the death of Paul the Octopus. Paul, you'll remember, was the Octopus gifted with future sight, correctly predicting 8 for 8 match ups in this year's World Cup tournament, mostly following his home country Germany until they were eliminated, and then accurately predicting Spain's title win. Well, Paul passed away last night in his aquarium at the Oberhausen Sea Life Centre. He was almost three years old and cause of death is assumed to be old age. No foul play is suspected.
Let us be clear: those Germans killed Paul. They hated him after he predicted Germany's loss and then even more when he saw Spain's fated win. He already had received death threats from the Argentinians and the Iranians but he should've been safe from them. No, his enemies were much closer to home. The Germans couldn't just let Paul go off and live the rest of his life as a hero in a Spanish aquarium. Oh, no. They held on to him until the world's attention was elsewhere and then they murdered him for abandoning the German football team. I don't have proof, but I know it in my heart to be true. RIP, Paul. Thank you for supporting Spain!!