Tuesday, August 11, 2009

I vs. Fly

I finally managed to kill these two giant flies that have been buzzing around my apartment for nearly a week. It's not really worth a whole big blog post, I know, but I couldn't help but mention it. I really dislike flies. I find them very distracting. I can't really relax if i see them zooming around my living room or kitchen. And as much as i tried, i could not kill these two. I nicknamed them Grendel and Grendel's Mother. They got into my apartment when I opened my kitchen window when The Good Pot was destroyed. I tried swatting at them with papers and magazines, but they always zipped past me. I tried buying a fly swatter at the store but i couldn't find one for purchase Rite Aid is poised to declare it Halloween Season any day now. and summer supplies are no longer in stock. The dollar store was also out-of-stock. I was running out of options. Could i just wait out the life expectancy of these flies. They couldn't live forever. But I wanted them gone sooner rather than later.

Finally, two night's ago as I was locking my front door before bed, Grendel came zooming around me and hovered for a while just about a foot away from my face. As he stared menacingly at me, I brought both of my hands up quickly as if i was crashing cymbals together. Grendel was caught and killed. One down, one to go.

The next morning, Grendel's Mother zoomed around me with unbridled rage. I tried the Cymbal Smack Death Trap on her, but she would not be taken so easily. Nor would she shy away from making her presence know. She zipped around all over the place, and seemed to revel in her victory as I left for work without being able to kill her. When I returned in the evening, however, her number was up. She flew into the bathroom while I was washing my hands, and I got the upper-hand for good. Closing the door behind me, Grendel's Mother has nowhere to go. Her whole defense had been based on the fact that she could always change course and flee the room if i got too close. Now she was stuck and I could just swat away at her with my rolled up magazine until I finally scored a direct hit. It took 5 or 6 good tries, but I finally I connected and Grendel's Mother was slain. Sweet Victory!

There is peace and prosperity in my kingdom once more. No need to summon Beowulf.

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