Thursday, March 26, 2009

False Idols: A Bit Too Proud To Beg

Sarver. you seem like a nice guy. I did not mind you like I've minded others like you in the past. or how I continue to mind Gokey. Mo Town was not your thing, Dawg. It was pitchy. It was not in your pocket. It was a hot mess. I don't know that it was actually the WORST performance of the night (see below) but between you and Matt not getting saved by the Judge's Vote? I pick you. So you have to go home, which must be sad for you, but you get to see your baby girl, so that's good!

Let's be honest: you were no longer in it to win it. I actually think it's a rather high percentage of contestants over the years who get to the top 10, 12, 13-whatever, and then realize they are done with the pace and the rigors of televised competition. I could feel through the screen that you were ready to be done. Not with music! Just with the show. It has to be a very unreal experience. I don't blame you. Hug and kiss your baby girl, and enjoy that Idol tour!

Contestant on the Edge:

Matt! Oh dear. I thought we were gonna have another Alexis debacle on our hands for a hot minute. I don't know what the problem is. Maybe going early screwed you. I like you and I liked your performance. Keep on doing what you're doing. Sing the hell out of things and if you can hang in a couple more weeks and this happens again, maybe those crazy judges will save your ass. I want you to stay around for a nice long time.

Rant of the Week

Megan Joy. Girl. Are you okay? Are you sure whatever got you last week was Influenze B? Really? Cuz that was craaaaaazy. Not Fantasia Crazy (unfortunately). Not Sanjaya Crazy (thank goodness). It was a little 8 Days A Week Crazy (I can't remember the girl who sang that last year) which means it was frantic and unsettling. The judges called it a train wreck and it totally was. There are only 3 females left in this competition. I don't need this competition to be a total sausage-fest by the time we get to top 6. So fight a bit harder and pick songs that work WITH your inherent craziness, not against it! Please!

Gokey. You're just not my kettle of fish. Don't take it personally. I'm not a fan of Adam either, though I can respect his talent and impressive vocals. Last night, I didn't enjoy your performance for all the reasons Simon articulated. You should know better than to go against the legendary guest mentor's advice, if you want the judges to give you decent feedback. I don't think you're going anywhere anytime soon, but I'm hoping it works out that when you get eliminated, the Judge's Save won't be available to you. Because I know they'd want to save you and it would tickle me that the Judge's hands were tied. Again, it's not you, it's me.

p.s. Better clothing this week, Anoop! Keep it up!

1 comment:

NoddyMonkey said...

Ha ha love this post. I truly do not see the appeal of Megan Joy besides her incredible beauty. She makes me truly cringe uncomfortably when she is on screen, ESPECIALLY when she shimmies. Good God. And Sarver never had a chance, he was just taking up space.