Friday, January 30, 2009

I Simply Remember My 25 Things and then I Don't Feel So Bad

I don't know who started this random 25 things thing on Facebook, but I'm sure many would try to take credit. It seems to have entered the zeitgeist. Here's my list. I like how it came out.

1. I feel like my therapist really "gets" me.

2. I absolutely love riding rollercoasters, but if you saw me on line for one you might think i was walking down The Green Mile.

3. I've never had a beer, and there are roughly two cases of 'em in my fridge right now left over from my birthday party. In October. Does beer go bad?

4. I would like to have my picture taken with Rafael Nadal. I can't see how to make this happen. He was so close to me on the practice courts at the US Open, and yet still so far. Plus if he was standing next to me, i might just freak the fuck out.

5. I'm gassy, but it's almost impossible for me to say the words "i farted." I'm not trying to deny I supplied it, as the saying goes, the words just won't come out of my mouth. I've tried! So many times I've tried!

6. I believe I'm supposed to marry Kelly Clarkson. I can't see how to make this happen. Plus if she was standing next to me, I might just freak the fuck out.

7. I feel weird that I'm at the most financially stable place in my life in the midst of a global economic nightmare. It's not like I'm sitting on a mountain of cash, but I'm okay. I'm really concerned for people losing their jobs. I think about it a lot.

8. I recently had a 7 year old ask me what I wanted to be when i grew up, and i honestly couldn't remember. What did I REALLY want to be? A writer. I will get there. OR a superehero. More of a challenge.

9. I think pets are too much work, but i look forward to having one again.

10. I understand Spanish a lot better than I can speak it. And now I know a lot of bad words thanks to Oscar Wao!

11. I am bad with homophones. especially when i'm typing, but sometimes too when I'm writing longhand.

12. Often in life I find that i'm asking myself, "What would Jerri Blank do?" And then I quote her.

13. I spent most of my life under the impression that I was a very bad person in a previous life and that I had to make up for it in this life. And then I was walking around one day a couple months ago and realized, "wait that's just something I totally made up when i was, like, 8." So I've let it go.

14. I am the King Of Freeze Tag. I will run you all down and freeze all your asses. I am not kidding. Having a "base" won't save you. You're all frozen. End of line.

15. Asparagus is my mortal foe.

16. I've only cursed at my father once (and that time he TOTALLY deserved it) and out of respect I don't see myself doing it again. Unless it was something like he had a heart attack and I was adminstering CPR until the paramedics got there and i said something like "don't you fucking die on me!" then i would curse at him.

17. I don't know how to administer CPR.

18. I always thought I should run the NYC Marathon, and having now done so, I know I was right to do it.

19. I think romantic relationships are too much work, but I look forward to having one again.

20. I drink a lot of milk. Around 4 or 5 glasses a day. Milk is the best!

21. I'm a total disciplinarian with kids, but they still love me because I BRING IT when it's time to play Cops & Ninjas or Barbies.

22. Over the past 11 years, I've had this dream where my mom (who's really dead) comes back to life, and then dies again, SO MANY TIMES that when I'm awake, i almost forget that it's not an actual memory of something that happened. It's odd that a dream can almost become a memory.

23. I really like hugging people. If it were socially acceptable, I'd always have my arms around someone.

24. I'm great at multi-tasking if one of the tasks is being online. Don't hate. I like being close to y'all even if you're far away.

25. Chances are, even if we are not the type of friends to talk all the time, you and i have shared "A Moment" between us. And I like to think that Moment exists in perpetuity, outside the linear time stream, acting like a beacon, sending out a signal that forever tells you "i love you."

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